PickUp Lines
by Sunstorm of ThunderClan
Summary: Puck uses pick-up lines on the Glee members
1. Chapter 1

**You know the drill. I do not own Glee, etc.**

Puck walked up to Kurt. "Excuse me, but I think I dropped something." he said.

Kurt eyed him warily. "What?"

Puck winked at him. "My jaw." he said, then walked away, leaving Kurt staring at him in confusion.

oOoOoO

Rachel smiled at Puck as he walked up to her. "Hey, I was just looking for you. I have a plan to get Finn back and I need you to help me make him jealous."

"Sorry, Rach. Can't do it." Puck said. "By the way, did it hurt?"

Rachel blinked in confusion. "Did what hurt?"

"Falling out of heaven." Puck replied, before walking away.

oOoOoO

Puck grinned as he looked at Finn. This would be too easy. He walked over and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey dude." Finn said, looking up.

"Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes." Puck said, then walked away.

oOoOoO

Mercedes sighed and looked up. "What do you want, Puck?"

"If I followed you home, would you keep me?" Puck asked.

Merecedes stared at him. "Oh, you going to get it now." she said, standing up.

Puck got up and walked away before she could grab him.

oOoOoO

Brittany smiled at Puck. "Hey. Did you come to see my alien?"

"Maybe another time, Brittany." Puck replied. "Where have you been all my life?"

Brittany was confused. "What do you mean? I've been here... I think."

Puck sighed. "Never mind. I'm just messing around."

"Messing around with what?"

Puck leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. "Never change, Brittany."

oOoOoO 

"Hey, bro. I keep hearing strange rumors that you're using pick up lines on the Glee club."

Puck looked over at Sam. "Maybe." he replied. "Can I have directions?"

"Um, to where?" Sam asked.

"To your heart." Puck said.

oOoOoO

"Your name must be Mickey, cause you're so fine."

Santana looked up at Puck. "Boy, you better start running right now."

Puck grinned and walked away.

oOoOoO

Mike eyed Puck warily. "Go away. Kurt already warned me about you."

Puck slung an arm over Mike's shoulder. "Warned you about what?"

"The pick up lines. He said you're hitting everyone in Glee club."

"Am not." Puck replied. "By the way, what time is it?"

Mike looked down at his watch. "It's 2:30. Why?"

Puck grinned as he pulled away. "It's 2:30 pm on Thursday, March 17. Thanks, I just wanted to remember the exact moment I met you." He walked off before Mike could say anything else.

oOoOoO

Mercedes groaned. "Don't look now but Pick-up Puck is coming our way."

Tina looked over just as Puck appeared beside them. "Hey, Tina, was your dad a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars and put them in your eyes." He made his escape while Tina tried to come up with a retort.

oOoOoO

Puck walked up beside Artie. "Hey, Artie, pinch me."

"Why?" Artie asked.

"Because you're so fine, I must be dreaming."

oOoOoO

Puck walked up to Lauren. "Ouuch!" he cried, putting a hand up to the side of his face.

"What's the matter with you?" Lauren asked.

"My tooth hurts because you're so sweet." Puck said, the ran off before she could kill him.

oOoOoO

Puck studied Quinn. He'd have to be careful with her. He walked up to her. "Hey, Quinn. How's it going?"

"Great, until you showed up." Was the reply.

Puck winced. "Wow, that really hurt."

"Shut up."

"So eloquent."

"What do you want?" Quinn asked, turning to look at him.

"Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'."


	2. Chapter 2

Quinn looked around. "Good, everyone's here." she said. "I'm sure you all know that Puck has been using pick up lines on all of us."

"Yeah, he has." Mike said with a scowl. "I've had a bunch of people asking if I was gay."

"Me too." Artie agreed.

"Alright. Then I'm sure you'll agree that we need to get back at him. Any suggestions?"

"Why don't we beat him at his own game?" Mercedes suggested. She looked around at everyone. "You know, use pick up lines on him? Maybe it'll teach him not to mess with us. He needs to learn that we're his friends, not his test dummies."

"You're right, Mercedes." Rachel spoke up. "Once Puck realizes that we won't take this laying down, I'm sure he'll reconsider doing things like this in the future."

Santana stood up. "I hate to agree with Manhands here, but she's got a point."

Quinn nodded. "Alright. Well, let's go home then, and research pick up lines."

oOoOoO

Kurt straightened his shirt, and walked over to Puck, who looked up. "What do you want, Hummel?"

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

oOoOoO

Puck glanced at Rachel. "Hey."

"Hey, Puck. Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot."

Rachel took a deep breath. "I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?" She turned an interesting shade of red and ran off.

oOoOoO

"Um, you have really beautiful...uh...eyes, yeah. You are pretty. What I mean is... You have a nice forehead." Finn stuttered.

Puck watched him, amused.

"Do you believe in when I walk by..." Finn sighed and started to walk away, muttering something under his breath.

oOoOoO

Merecedes walked up to Puck. "There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it." she told him, then walked away.

oOoOoO

Brittany grinned at Puck. "Hey."

"Hey, Brittany."

"Um, I was looking at a light bulb today and it made me think of you and how you light up my world." Brittany said solemnly.

oOoOoO

"So, what do you do for fun?" Sam asked, sitting next to Puck.

Puck took a drink of soda. "Why?"

"Because I'm going to ask you out."

Puck choked, spitting his soda out. When he looked up, Sam was gone.

oOoOoO

Santana smiled at Puck. "I'm easy. Are you?" she asked.

Puck groaned and walked away.

oOoOoO

"Move, Chang." Puck said, trying to get around Mike, who just grinned at him.

"Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?"

Puck stared at him, then turned around with a groan and left.

oOoOoO

"If I could reach out and hold a star for everytime you've made me smile, I'd hold the sky in the palm of my hand."

Puck looked at Tina and raised an eyebrow at her. "That's the best you can do?"

Tina shrugged. "You used something like that on me, remember."

oOoOoO

Artie wheeled up to Puck. "Can I take your picture?"

"Why?"

"Because I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas."

oOoOoO

Puck stared at Lauren. "You're leaning on my locker. Can you move?"

Lauren ignored him. "Somebody needs to write explosive on you, because you are the bomb." she said, then walked away.

Puck proceeded to hit his head on the locker in front of him. Several times.

oOoOoO

"Is there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I've been searching for."

Puck groaned. "Ok. I get it, Quinn. Knock it off."

Quinn smiled. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. No more pick up lines."

"Good."


End file.
